When you ask "What's next?"

"What's Next?"

You whisper under you breath.
Knowing that you would be the only one to hear those two little words.
When you get to a point of exasperated questioning.
You just don't know.
How do I fit?
Where is my path?
You inhale, with the weight of the future on your chest.
You exhale all the stress that led up to it.
It sinks in that you don't know.
You just don't know.
And in that moment, the fear of the unknown cripples you.
Your always-planned-out life is so far from where you thought it would be.
Not in a bad way, just not where you expected.
But you mutter those little words into the sky.

"What's Next?"

The chaos is palpable.
Thoughts bounce from one realm to the next.
You asked it into the unknown.
The words leave your lips and fear starts to bubble.
The anxiety hits.
'I don't know what's next,' you think to yourself.
But then you feel it.
You feel the calm of knowing that you are taken care of.
The peace of not knowing, and being okay with that.
With closed eyes.
Hands open to receive whatever is meant to come your way.
Whatever your higher power, the universe, or the winds of change move into your life.
You are ready to accept it.
Because you asked that little powerful question.

"What's Next?"

The fear is still there. The questions haven't disappeared.
But you know.
Next is unknown.
Next is malleable.
You know that in the moments of uncertainty, Next will show it's face.
It will open it's arms and embrace your discomfort.
It will give you safe refuge.
It might not be easy, but it will be worth it.
You realize that giving yourself up so wholly to the universe creates a vulnerability that you have never known.
A vulnerability that is equally terrifying and empowering.

"What's Next?"

Despite the fear, there is comfort.
Comfort in knowing that your open stance will bring to fruition an adventure like none you have ever experienced.
You breathe again.
Deeper.
Stronger.
More powerful.
The crippling fear turns into an elixir of excitement.
You savor the sweet buzz of what could be.
All because you had the courage to ask yourself.

"What's Next?"

The Power of Fear

Fear.

We've all been scared.

The things differ; spiders, death, heights, public speaking. You name it, someone is scared of it. There is even a fear of blushing (it's called Ereuthrophobia, in case you were wondering). No matter who you are, something scares you.

Fear is asking your crush on a date.
Fear is quitting your job.
Fear is hearing your doctor tell you that you and your husband cannot have children.
Fear is hearing that you are pregnant.
Fear is depression.
Fear is thinking you'll be alone forever.
Fear is watching your parent go through chemo.
Fear is attending your best friend's funeral.
Fear is getting dumped.
Fear is a $1200 repair bill for your car when you barely have enough money to cover rent.

People have fear in abundance. We live in a culture where terrorist organizations prey on it. Politicians fuel it. Self-help authors capitalize on it. We live in a world where fear is not only something that exists, but something that is a given. It's not if you are afraid, but what you are afraid of.

We are all scared of something. Regardless of what spooks you, fear is a powerful emotion; one that can absolutely cripple your heart and soul. It's an emotion that causes doubt, anxiousness, indecision, conflict, failure, judgment. The power can paralyze. It can weigh you down. It can break loved ones away. But fear is also something that can be harnessed.

I currently have some things in my life that I am afraid of, specifically the fear of failure and the fear of the unknown. The great, wide abyss that is my future terrifies me. I could waste away, waiting for the right decision to fall on my head like an Acme Anvil; I could flip through plan after plan without taking the first leap of faith; I could sit in terror that I will die, poor and alone. Sure, it's dramatic, but it's real and it's really powerful.

OR…

I could use this fear to help determine the realms that scare me. I can introspectively look at the ways I can conquer this fear. I can lean on the support of my nearest and dearest. I can take the first step, knowing that the powerful beast I call self doubt is the biggest competitor against a life of confidence and resilience. I can face those fears, like Harry Potter faces the boggart. I can trust myself, my higher power and basic science that this fear won't scare me to literal death. Fear is powerful, but it teaches you. It teaches you how to be strong, to learn from yourself, and to survive.

So, like any power, you must decide… will the power of fear be used to better you or to destroy you?