Thankful for Crap.

It's that time of year.

You see an insane amount of Facebook posts, tweets and instagrams starting with, "I'm thankful for..." or "Day 17 of Thanksgiving" or "Thank you all for _____. #blessed." I am 100% guilty of this, and despite the fact that I didn't do my 'X-amount of Thankful days', I have so much to be thankful for this year.

See, it's easy to list off all the good stuff that I'm thankful for, and the people that have blessed me this year. It's easy to throw out the classics like Family, Friends, a stable job, and the list of cliches that goes on and on.

What we oftentimes forget to appreciate is the Crap that happens in the year. The stuff that makes us really pull our hair out and maybe even cry a little bit. At No End In Sight, we like to spin "The Bad" and see it through a different lens, turning it into "The Good", so that's exactly what I'm going to do.


I'm thankful for:

Having a job that completely BROKE me.
For those of you who are new to No End In Sight, you might not know that I started this blog as a way to keep myself positive in the midst of a perpetually destructive work environment. I had never been treated so poorly in my life. Sure I had the occasional crazy boss, but this workplace was ROUGH! Like, multiple breakdowns crying at my desk. I was ridiculed, degraded, and made to believe that I was stupid on a regular basis. After 2 months, I was already looking for a new job because I was literally depressed from my work. However, I am SO thankful for this job because it led me to a job that I ADORE! Sure, I don't want to wake up in the morning because I love to sleep, but I have never NOT wanted to come to work. I work with people who build me up, who value me and my opinions, who are passionate about their job, and who are literally changing the world. Without that crappy, miserable, destructive job, I would not have found this place that brings me such joy and accomplishment.

Getting my heart broken.
Obviously, this has been a big topic on the blog over the last few months. There is no easy way to handle a breakup, especially when infidelity is involved. However, I am SO thankful for this heartbreak becuase it showed me that I can love deeply, lose it, and come out as a stronger person. For the first time in months, I am genuinely, not-faking-it, happy. I am doing more with my life and meeting new people. I'm exploring. I'm relaxing. I'm building myself up in ways that I didn't think were possible three months ago. Yep, I got hurt. Yep, I got cheated on. Yep, I am the bigger person and I know that my life took a much more positive turn on that Monday afternoon when I got dumped via text at work. Despite that, I win. I'm strong and I win!

Losing some friends.
Losing friends is inevitable. It's crappy, but it's a fact of life. Some friends will stick around for a little while, and some friends will stick around for life. And some won't stick around, period. However, I am SO thankful for this loss of friendship because it reinforces the relationships that are still around, making them stronger than ever. Friendship is the force that has gotten me through this year of difficulty, and I couldn't be more thankful for that.

Experiencing financial hardship.
There is nothing more stressful that money. It is hands-down the most difficult aspect of life. I hate the feeling of putting $4.89 in your gas tank and hoping it lasts you til payday. If you've never been there, I salute you. There were a couple of times this year where I could not make it. I had to ask for help, which to me, was failure. I was ashamed and embarrassed to need help, but it was necessary. However, I am SO thankful that struggled with money because through the kindness of loved ones, I was able to get back on my feet. I was able to make ends meet and appreciate the support I had, and will always have, behind me.

Moving. Twice.
Moving is a real bitch. Sorry for the language but it really is. Not only does moving suck, but it's also really, stupidly expensive. You have to pay for the new deposit, you have to pay for the gas of a bajillion trips to and from your new place, and you have to purchase the things that your new place needs. The amount of times I have moved in the last couple years is ridiculous. However, I am SO thankful for moving because I am safe with a roof over my head, in apartment that I LOVE and a roommate I ADORE. The shuffling of stuff is always annoying but hopefully we'll be in this place for a while because I love it.

Realizing my health sucked.
I know I've gone over this a few times lately, but I realized around March that my body was yet another thing bringing me over the edge of the cliff of depression. I was out of shape. I was weak. I was chubby. I was not happy with how I looked, felt or acted in regards to health. I was drinking consistently (not large quanitities, but frequently), eating junk food regularly and the only exercise I got was through walking up the stairs to my apartment, which left me totally winded by the time I got to the third floor. However, I am SO thankful that I was hitting rock bottom with my health because I knew something had to change. Thankfully, I had a positive influence in my life at the time regarding fitness, so I was able to make the necessary decisions to get mysef healthier. Now, 8 months later, I have lost 15 pounds and can actually walk up the stairs without losing my breath. I'm heading to California for Thanksgiving and cannot wait to play with my "nephew" without wanting to double over in loss of breath.


This was probably the hardest year of my life. I take that back. This WAS the hardest year of my life. But 2014 is the year of positive thoughts. I don't think I would have been able to make it through without that mantra, because even when I was struggling to get out of bed because the world was a big fat meany, I knew that good things happen and with a positive outlook, anything is possible. (Cue corny uplifting music!)

So even though this year was hard, and there were many "piles of crap," I am thankful. Thankful that I faced hardship with a smile on my face. Thankful that I  made it through to the other side of those hardships. Thankful for the support behind me.

I guess you could say I was pretty #blessed.